The times are changing

As I sit here and blog about this, I am thinking that most of you are going to think that I have lost my mind. My youngest will be one in a matter of minutes and my oldest will start pre-school in a couple of weeks. So my mommy role is changing a bit and quite honestly it is freaking me out. Forever, I have been able to control who my oldest talks to, spends time with, plays with and how he behaves. Now I have to let go a little and let him go to school. Questions are pouring into my head. What if kids are mean to him? What if he is bad? What if he uses the poopy word at school? What if he doesn't have the right shoes? What if he has an accident which he hasn't done in almost a year? What if he does something that makes people think I am a bad mom. What if, what if what if? I have a problem with worrying about things I can't control and this is one of them. I am also going to miss Jake for the hours he is gone. Jake and I have been business associates for three years. He has always come along with me to Strollerfit, sometimes to restore the core and often times to the office. His schedule has been modified to meet mine and mine to his. I think my problem is that sometimes I need Jake, more than he needs me. The same goes for Max. I gave up my profession, the ability to contribute financially to our family income and my identity as a professional to be a MOM. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but as my kids become more independent, they will seemingly need me less. That kind of freaks me out.

I addressed this with my friend, Sarah, who recently moved to Nashville. I can pretty much tell her anything without her thinking that I am going nuts. She said some of the same things. She has stayed home for 10 yrs... all the time running errands with her kids and planning her day around them. When they moved she found out that her kindergartner would be going to school all day. She said she flipped out. What was she going to do with only one kid at home all day.

A mom's role changes on a daily basis and milestones cause moms to change more. I guess the one thing that remains is that the day we all became moms we knew the most important job was to love our kids no matter what. I do know that I am good at that job.

In health,

Katie


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